They cannot be inherited, unlike Genes. They are intensely personal and fiercely individual. The perfect pair of jeans – is almost nonexistent. I decided to venture forth on a shopping expedition for Los vaqueros aka Jeans aka Denims.
One look at the multitude of brands and sub-types (jeggings, skinny, slim, boot cut, curvy etc) and I knew I was lost. The salesgirl materialized out of nowhere.
I said, ‘High waist, broad bottom.’ She looked critically at my Gluteus Maximus. 
Her expert eye said- ‘Not very broad.’
I hastily revised my words – ‘Broad at the ankles, I mean.’
Her brow cleared, but it wrinkled again, ‘Only low waist and narrow ankles.’ she said.
I felt ancient, over the hill, out of sync.
Low-waist jeans is a fashion trend (???) that is beyond my understanding – It is a very low joke on Indian figures. It hits Indian women below the belt, literally.
I sighed and settled for mid-waist. “Size ‘n’, please,” I requested. She sized me up in another withering glance, ‘Size n+2.’ she asserted.
I didnt feel n+2, and I stubbornly repeated my earlier request. She shrugged and brought me n.
The trial room was a trial. Size n wouldn’t fit me! Shamefaced, I opened the room to find her ready with n+2, along with a smug, been–there-done-that grin.
It fit. Feeling very low (even in a mid-waist) , bloated and irritated, I chose not to buy the pair.
Came home and tried on my old size n. It fit perfectly! Then I realized the dirty trick of fashion brands.
The old size ‘n’ was being labeled, sold and marketed as ‘n+2’! It was a conspiracy! They were playing on my psyche, shaming me into conforming to some unreal Barbie-doll proportion.
Anyway, enjoy a look at these bizarre denim fashions. 
Oh, yes, ‘bizarre’ reminds me of a movie that I watched alone. Well, to be precise, there were exactly 5 more people in the audience. I never understood why it was named ‘Jeans’, but then the same emotion applied to the entire script.
The movie classifies as ‘See the entire movie to prove you are an Aishwarya Rai fan.’ I dutifully watched it all the way to the credits(???).
Have about your jeans shopping experience? Did you experience these mind-games, these tricks of emotional blackmail? I wonder how many industries benefit out of it – diet queens, gyms, liposuction clinics, psychiatrists, fashion industry?
Maam plz tell when is your novel Arjuna without a doubt is releasing
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Thank you for the interest, Mahima.
Final editing is underway, which will be followed by book cover design and page formatting etc.
So, with any luck, Jan-Feb 2015? Fingers crossed!
I will be posting updates on this blog as & when they occur. Thanx again
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I enjoyed the humor and truth in your piece. It really is interesting how often sizes are just numbers. One line’s size 6 is another line’s size 4. Yet it is profound how whether we fit into that number as opposed to if the number is right for us can really do a number on us.
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Hi, thanx. Yes, it is a number game. I just basically hate being taken for a ride by these branded icons.
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Hello, Sweety! Since I wear highly complicated ‘Veshti’s’ (Sarong/Wrap-around!), I do not even understand these simplistic new jean designs! Haha!
And Anyway, would say YOU have found the perfect pair! They fit You to a T! I say this with the Authority of an Uncle, of course. (I have decided to consider You as one of my Favourite Nieces!). All this from the profile picture You have presented, of course! 🙂
Much Love and Regards.
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Hello,
I have decided to stick to the old ones, for now. Until the irritating low-waist fashion goes out-of-fashion.
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Wise Girl. But the Old Ones look Good one You too! 🙂
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Oh I share the same feeling. It’s like a reality check every time I go to buy jeans. I have settled for pants for now 😛
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It’s like a market for unreal figurines. I heard of Japanese traditions where they deliberately shod girl’s feet since childhood into very tight shoes, so as to produce tiny feet – a sign of beauty.
Now international brands seems to want to squeeze our pelvic bones into their idea of slimness.
Anyways, Thank you for dropping by.
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Haha1 cute post. I totally agree….good fit jeans is difficult to find and I so hate this low jeans thingy…excuse me, not everyone has or wants a Kareena figure.
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Hi, so true! Indian women are voluptuous – and we should be proud of it. Variety makes for spice. It would be a dull world if everybody looked like everybody.
While white-skinned people yearn to get tanned, we promote fairness creams! While they swoon over curvy Indians, we try to revert our genetic tendencies.
Slimness is a desirable trait from heath point of view, but anorexia is not!
Thank you for your words.
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God! That movie ‘Jeans’ was just so nonsensical and with a title that was completely out of line with the story 😛
I never buy jeans online for exact fitting is required so after a lot of ‘trying’, I buy a pair 🙂
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Hi Ankita
Yes, it was a senseless movie. But as a die-hard Aishwarya fan I sat through it. Her luminous beauty compensated for all the rest.
Now that I think back, when we say ‘pair of jeans’, we mean a single apparel. The movie had one pair of real twin brothers and also single Aishwarya pretending to be twin sisters. So maybe, there was some connection to the movie title…
Anyways, thank you for dropping by
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